Bipolar; your mood may not be your own

Rachel

Written by: Rachel Miller

When I was 18 years old I was diagnosed as Bipolar.

The diagnosis at the time made complete sense as I was experiencing symptoms which correlated highly to the condition: severe depression, euphoric highs, restlessness, agitation, anxiety and panic attacks. I seemed so extremely sensitive to environments and people.

At the time of diagnosis I initially felt relief that the difficulties I had were identifiable and treatable.

Over the years, and having tried various medications and therapies, I have found improvement to a certain extent. However, I always felt that there was no hope of completely gaining control over the mood swings and to be able to have a ‘normal’ working life, which was where my main difficulties lay.

Dawn

In 2010, I was going through another depressive episode, and to put it bluntly, I’d not truly been ‘living’ for years. I had fallen into a state of chronic despair and hopelessness.

But then I met Dawn.

Dawn is a spiritual development teacher who I came across at a local Mind, Body and Soul fair. She had a stand where she was giving Bach Flower Remedy consultations and mediumship readings. I felt compelled to book a session, and was so struck with the information and help that Dawn provided me that I signed up to her spiritual development classes.

Spiritual Development Classes

Spiritual developmentThe first spiritual development class I attended interested me greatly. Dawn taught us something called grounding‘ and ‘clearing our energies‘. She highlighted the importance of these techniques in working with ‘Spirit’ (her term for God/Source Energy/the Divine/the Light or however else you perceive a higher power). At the time I wasn’t too sure what to make of the exercises.

After the first class, Dawn asked me how I found the session and told me that I was extremely sensitive and that I should clear my energies regularly. I was struck by the fact that she was certain and clear about this issue which affected my life so profoundly. How could she know this about me? We hardly knew each other. I was intrigued by her suggestion of energy clearing and, on the way home, compiled a mental list of questions to ask her next session.

Bipolar and Sensitivity

Bipolar and SensitivityMore than anything I wanted to know what she meant when she said I was extremely sensitive. Over the course of the next few sessions, Dawn answered my questions and told me that my sensitivity was a gift– that I would be able to help to heal people who had been through similar experiences to me. At the time I couldn’t see it as a gift at all- sensitivity had made my working life impossible.

I asked Dawn about Bipolar Disorder and she said that my symptoms could be related to as Bipolar Disorder, but they could also be attributed to my sensitivity and the fact that I ‘picked up on’ other people’s energy and emotions. Basically, I could be chatting with a friend and sense how they were feeling. I wouldn’t just sense it, I would merge with it and take it on as my own. If somebody I knew was angry, I would unconsciously allow their anger to impinge on me and soon I would be feeling angry and negative too.

This could also explain why I would panic in crowded places- I was picking up on so much psychic energy that I had no skill in dealing with, that I was completely overwhelmed with emotion, noise, lights, smells and feelings all in one go.

Psychic Energy

Psychic EnergyThe sensitivity also allowed me to pick up on psychic energy of those who were deceased and had remained earthbound. I could hardly believe this! So did this mean that not all my intense despair and depression was necessarily my own? Dawn, said that yes, there was a high possibility that earthbound spirits had remained attached to me for different reasons- some were confused and did not know they were dead and just wanted help. I could take on the emotion of a spirit just as I could a living person.

This made so much sense as to why I was experiencing so many intense emotions that would appear as mood swings.

By grounding and clearing my energy Dawn said that I would be able to recognize the energy which truly belonged to me, and that which belonged to other people or entities.

At first I must admit, I was a bit freaked out by all the talk of entities and earthbound spirits, but I soon came to realise that most in the spirit world were just normal people, not the horrific demons portrayed in films.

What is Grounding?

Imagine a very large tree. Without roots that burrow deep into the earth, it would fall over.

In the simplest of terms, this is what can happen to us if our energy is not firmly rooted into the ground!

But instead of falling over, being ungrounded could look like this:

  • dizziness
  • spaciness
  • lack of focus
  • not being able to fully engage in life
  • poor concentration/indecisive/apathetic

Ungoundedness causes us to be less present in the world, therefore less effective in using our innate power to create a productive and fulfilling life in the world.

Without purpose and fulfilment, we can feel lost, alone and depressed.

When we are grounded, we feel:

  • clear-headed
  • focused
  • purposeful
  • good concentration
  • decisive

We are fully present in the world and have a clearer sense of our purpose in life.

How do we become more grounded?

There are many ways to become more grounded, including physical exercise, cleaning, gardening, spending time in nature, and using crystals such as hematite. I like to use the following imagery whilst meditating:

Imagine roots leaving the soles of your feet and burrowing their way to the centre of the earth. Make the roots thick and strong. You should begin to feel heavier as if gravity is pulling you downwards with increasing intensity. Really relax into this feeling and experience it fully for a few minutes.

This can be a quick exercise, but needs to be performed with concentration and focus to get the full effect.

YouTube is a wonderful source to find helpful resources. Here is a grounding meditation:

How to Clear Our Energy

Clearing our energy is basically like taking an energetic shower and gets rid of any energy that doesn’t belong to us or no longer serves us- such as any energetic memory of an argument we had last week and that is no longer necessary for us to ‘hold on to’. This energy can remain in our auras, pull down our energy and make us feel ‘bleurgh’!!

Our energy is cleared automatically when we take a walk outside in nature and daylight.

Or we can visualise the following:

  1. first, ground yourself by pushing your energetic roots deep into the earth.
  2. take a few deep breaths to relax into the feeling of being grounded.
  3. imagine a thin silken thread of white light moving down towards the top of your head. You might like to see this as a star or as light shining down from heaven. It is important at this stage to have the intention of working with only the highest vibration and whitest of energies. You might like to state this in your mind or out loud.
  4. now imagine the stream of white light entering the top of your head and filling your whole body with a beautiful, vibrant, healing energy. Every single cell is saturated in this pure white light.
  5. allow this white light to mop up any negative energy, any energy that doesn’t belong to you or no longer serves you. Again it is important to have this intention and perhaps state it in your head or out loud.
  6. now imagine the light filling your roots, and leaving your roots right at the bottom, into the earth, taking with it any of the energy you wish to clear. Have the intention of allowing it to leave your body and energy field.
  7. allow this to occur for a minute or two.

If you find this difficult to visualise, it can be helpful to think of a stream of water flowing through your body and into the ground, instead of the white light, washing away any energy that doesn’t belong to you or no longer serves you.

After performing this exercise, you should feel refreshed, re-energised, clearer and more grounded. You should have a sense of your own energy.

This meditation might prove useful:

Once you have practised this exercise regularly for a week or more, you will begin to recognise when you have taken on somebody else’s energy and emotion, or when it is affecting you. You will recognise that you are beginning to feel yucky and down when you sit in a room with somebody else who is also feeling this way. You felt fine before you sat with them, now you feel low. This is most certainly a case of the other person’s energy entering your energy field, but now you know how to clear it!

Protection

To prevent somebody else’s energy entering your energy field, imagine you are encased in a bubble of light and surrounding the bubble is a shield of golden light, through which no negative energy can enter.

Practice, practice, practice!

As with most skills, the greatest improvement and benefits can be achieved with regular practice. The more you get used to the feeling of your own energy, without the contamination from the energy of others, the more likely you will be able to identify the latter and clear it from your energy field.

You will be less prone to swings in mood caused by external energies.

How Grounding, Clearing and Protection have helped me.

Before learning about energy, I felt that I was helpless to control my ‘Bipolar’ mood swings and the intense emotions and sensitivity which affected my life so greatly.

Once I learnt to see my symptoms in terms of sensitivity and energy, I felt more empowered to be able to help myself to control the emotions. Everything made more sense and the exercises worked!

Spiritual development hasn’t just been about energetic techniques. I’ve also found the personal development aspect invaluable, whereby we work towards accepting, forgiving and loving ourselves and others, just as we are.

Important Note

I would also like to emphasize that I am still taking medication and do not recommend using these techniques as a substitute for your meds. Keep taking the tablets!!

Resources

Mend the Gap- by Katie Mottram

Related Posts on Emotional Wellness

Mend the Gap: A New Hope for Mental Health

Bipolar Disorder as Spiritual Awakening

Bipolar Disorder and Highly Sensitive People

Bipolar Disorder: A Spiritual Perspective for 2013

 

Rachel Miller is the blog author of Emotional Wellness; moving from emotional chaos to self-love and balance.  She writes informative and personal posts that combines her experiences, spirituality and love for research.

You can read all of Rachel’s MHT guest posts here.


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Comments

  • Paul Illidge

    What a fabulous, informative article this is. It’s inspiring, but it’s also practical and, as Rachel suggests, possible, through “practice, practice, practice.” Her discussion of sensitivity and bi-polar disorder was a real eye-opener for me. Much appreciated!

    • Rachel Miller

      Hi Paul,

      Thanks so much for your positive comments! I’m really glad you found the article helpful!

      Rachel

  • Katy Reigh

    Hi Rachel,

    I am a HSP…..but extremely evolved and have learned how to handle my gifts but I have a friend who is dealing with depression now as I once was myself and dealing with several other issues, he is a very gifted empath, psychic medium, like myself but newer and considering his past and his current state (he was recently told he COULD be bipolar) I am struggling to help him in some way. They recently put him on meds again. I have taken meds myself but not for many many years, I practice holistic health. Maybe you could please email me and help me figure out a way to help him? I am sure you are very busy but it never hurts to ask.

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